2:36pm - Monday, Jun. 24, 2002
Nothing's Shocking
Have you ever wanted to do something shocking just for the hell of it, just to see what would happen? Something silly for no real reason. Like, if I had a nice two-melon ass instead of a white-woman-peach butt, I'd like to go into a nudy bar some night, drop my drawers and lay a big ole' log right on the floor.Then I'd zip up my pants and walk out.

Bet that would raise a few eyebrows. Can you imagine what would happen after I'd left?

"Did you see that!?" "Dude! Some chick just took a crap on the floor!" "Nice ass!"

Of course, I'd never do that, mostly 'cause it's not fair to the person who'd have to clean it up. Also, I would have crusty butt, having not wiped. Makes me giggle to imagine it though.

Or what if I walked right into a men's rest room, stood in front of a urinal and whizzed. Hee hee.

I have less grandiose ideas too, ones that don't involve elimination... like licking a complete stranger's ice cream, or giving a speech with my skirt tucked into my panty-hose in back just to see if anyone would tell me.

One time Loon and I were fixing caramel apples in the kitchen and I noticed how the caramel looked JUST like earwax, so I got a q-tip and dipped it in, then went into the other room and started a conversation while I pretended to clean my ear. When the moment was right I pulled out the chunky q-tip, licked it, and went right on talking. Hee hee hee... of course, the people present knew me well enough to know something was up, but it was funny none-the-less.

Today I am all about hyphens, have you noticed?